Friday, May 09, 2008
Some days of fun left, before I run off to happiness.... (I hope so!)
A rainbow appeared at11:20 AM***
I have returned to blogging only because I have reached this significant milestone of my life. I would like to be 'self-reflexive' (Dr Gana) and have it documented.
Yesterday (8 May 08) at 3pm marked my final exam as an undergraduate of NUS. Like lynn, I was really glad that it was Dr Gana's quali inquiry. Having a soci paper as my last exam really reinstated the fact that I am a soci major and served as a proper closure for me. I ended my exam pretty early yesterday. I could have left the exam hall, but chose to continue sitting there and enjoy what's left of school. I was in fact very tempted to write at the end of my exam scripts "Dr Gana, this is my last paper as an undergraduate". Unfortunately, having to conform to the structural limitations, I chose not to do it.
Walking out of school turned me into an emo graduate! Thoughts of no more soci, no more NUS, no more this and that really made me feel sad. These 3 years have passed so quickly and at the same time, I am also amazed at how quickly my mind got transformed and stretched as a result of soci. Soci made me such a keen observer and best of all, everyday we're still constructing new constructions. In the words of lynn, this makes us a "always a sociologist in the making".
This morning I woke up and felt .... weird. I woke up to having no books and no timeline to complete school stuff. I need to change the lifestyle that I have known for my entire life. I'm now in liminal space. Sociologists say liminality = ambiguity = POWER. I choose to defer. This liminality makes me feel powerless, without something to hold onto and not knowing what to expect.
This sem I stayed in school to study till almost 8pm, ate in school every other day, went back to school to study during study week and even during exams - all the firsts for me.
I don't intend to throw/give away my soci books. I can't imagine not reading soci books and engaging my mind. I don't want to be stuck in the 'system' and allow my mind to degenerate.
Now I don't know what to do with my pens, highlighters, foolscap papers, eraser etc........
A rainbow appeared at10:41 AM***
